Chapter 4 : The Part Where I Sell Out Part 1

Knowing GUY he will show me something I really hate. I have no idea who the programmer is, but this guy is basically a mind reader. Seriously. How could he know very well?

Okay maybe my memory isn’t that good…why am I addressing myself like I’m talking to myself? Is there a fourth wall I don’t know? I’m not writing this in a journal or anything, so why am I talking like this?
Better go check and see what GUY has for me today. At least I will look somewhat saner.

I decided to go on a detour before I meet him. I don’t know why,but I want to see what my slaves…disciples are doing. I started by going to the intersection near my room. I went forward instead of left and tried to look at the signs.

It seems the lights are too dim, but enough for me to look around. I decided to try roaming around. I never even tried to look around before. I decided to turn back and check it next time. GUY might think I did something stupid while I was gone.

I retraced my steps and found GUY perfectly quiet. It seemed suspicious, so I slowly walked near him. I sat down. He then started to talk.

[What were you doing?]

“Is it illegal to pee?”

[No, but I have cameras all over the place. You really have bad memory.]

“Don’t blame me.”

[I’m pretty sure you were gonna wipe in their faces, so I showed some mercy and made sure it was dark.]

This is why I’m convinced that GUY can read minds.

“So what do you have for me today?”

[I want you to remember as much as you can about pop culture in the late 2000s. Got that?]

“Yes.”

[Now I’ll give you a few hints. The first few will seem unrelated, but you will figure out the rest eventually. I will let you know about the topic by saying a few names.]

“OK.”

[Hellboy.]

“I think I’m gonna like this one. Does it have something to do with monsters.”

[Close. I’ll give you a hint. The vlog I’m gonna show you takes place on earth.]

“This is going to be fun. Does it involve demons?”

[No.]

“What else happened on Hellboy? Umm…”

[You seem far off from my point. I’m going to give you another one. Ed Wood.]

[Zombies caused by aliens. Of course! Zombies.]

“Close, but not quite. Maybe I should start torturing you. Bram Stoker.”

“It all makes sense now. You have to be kidding me. Your talking about those despicable pedophiles.”

[Yes.]

“They’re actually on Earth?! How come I never saw them?”

[It’s kind of complicated and for one thing they don’t seem like it. Haven’t you seen-]

“Yes. I saw the movie and read the book and I could say ,without a doubt, that it sucks.”

[You did that just to say how much you hate it?]

“Pretty much.”

[Let’s roll the clip.]